I hate voicemail

Voicemail, it’s like talking to a wall but somebody gets to hear it whenever they check their phone. Nobody's good at it, I mean have you ever heard somebody when asked what they are good at say, “I’m great at leaving voicemails.” No! you’ll never hear that because no one is good at it, and if there was someone somehow that became good at it you’d know, they’d be a celebrity. Why this tirade about how crappy voicemail is? Let me explain with a little story. I didn’t just trip-I faceplanted it.

A little background: I been on a couple of dates with this girl, she was extremely pretty and very fun. I saw her talked to her the day before the voicemail and she’d said that she wanted to do something during the week. She worked early in the morning and would go to bed pretty early from around 9:45-10:00 pm.

To make it easier to understand, I’m going to put what was going on in my head in between brackets { }.

Now the long awaited voicemail after 4 rings:

“Hey Ashley this is Dan, sorry to call so late I know it’s past your bedtime {Did I just say bedtime in a voicemail?!!! Freak! Recover! Recover!} umm….i mean you have to get up early…umm you work early…Anywho so I was wondering if you wanted to hang out or do something this week…but if you don’t want to it’s totally {I can’t believe I just said if you don’t want to! Recover!} ummm..I mean if you don’t have time or if you’re busy…umm…well I guess if I don’t see you have a good weekend. Bye.”