Monday, December 13, 2010
It's time for a new Christmas story.
It all starts in place called Oregon. You see, one Christmas a few years ago, there was a teenager. The teenager liked to run; he also liked to drink eggnog. And as in any good Christmas tale, an idea was born. Now we’re not just talking about any ole’ idea here. We’re talking about an idea that revolutionizes runners, an idea more beautiful than Michelangelo’s Sistine Chapel or possibly even Michael Jordan’s dunk from the foul line….We’re talking about the Eggnog 400.
Eggnog is powerful like a drug but delicious like pie. Eggnog is smooth like bacon and thicker than maple syrup on a Belgium Waffle.
It’s 10 am, Saturday morn. Christmas is two weeks away. Runners swarm the track. They gather around a table smothered with gallons of Eggnog, each takes a cup filled with 8 ounces of rich sugary bliss. They swig. They line up. They scream “EGGNOG!!!” and then they run a lap under 90 seconds, a breezy 6-minute mile pace. Finish your lap, fill your cup, drink it up, it’s time to run again. To win drink the most and run the longest, without throwing up. Once you lose it you’re out.
Christmas is a time of miracles, and the Eggnog 400 is no exception. This year, those that raced witnessed something of Eggnog History.
Eight ounces short of having drunk a gallon of eggnog, he jogged across the line, cup in hand. One more cup left. He refilled, he looked down. He began to drink. Maybe reality began to set it a little as he realized after his last sip that he’d just drunk a gallon of eggnog while having run 3 and ¾ miles. There was one thing left to do to break the record, he had to run with a gallon of eggnog in his stomach. The previous record was set by a runner who had run the same distance and drunk a gallon as well. Unfortunately, he threw up before he was able to start his last lap. All this runner had to do was run, 10 meters, 20 meters, anything. He started….he made it 50 meters with a gallon in his belly before it all came a tumblin’ down.
THis holiday season, tell you family a tale of people giving all they have in the true spirit of Christmas. Tell them about the Eggnog 400..and maybe if your lucky you'll get to see them throw up some eggnog next year.
A long awaited challenge.
The boys were restless. It’d been four years since we bought 203 Junior Bacon Cheeseburgers.
When we bought the 203 Junior Bacon Cheeseburgers, one of the main leaders, Nick, suggested that as a follow up we do a chicken nugget challenge. Now, four years later, we decided it was time.
The basement was cold. Three of us sat there chatting about strategy. A location was chosen and pizza delivery bags were secured to keep the nuggets toasty.
Hype increased as word of a chicken nugget challenge spread. Some had moved on, but we still had some solid eaters in the area. The day before we sent the text message to over 40 friends, each person was to bring 5 dollars. 40x5=200. 200 orders of chicken nuggets, 5 nuggets in each order= 1,000 chicken nuggets.
We’d been waiting 30 minutes for the others. A Wendy’s employee impatiently walked to our table, “You guys need to either buy something or leave because right now you’re just loitering.” “Oh, we’ll buy something.”
Of the 15 that were there, most people put in $5, and a couple of us pitched in $10. “$70! That’s all we have? Well, I guess we could just order the rest when everyone else gets here.” We sat there silently, unsure of what to do. That’s when our friend Taylor got serious. “There’s no way we’re not buying a 1,000!!” And threw down $70 of his own money onto the table.
Everyone followed putting in all they had. Nick held over $200 in his hand. He approached the counter. “Yeah, I’d like 200 orders of chicken nuggets.” “Um..hold on let me get my manger.” The girl replied. The manager, “Yes?” Nick, “I’d like 200 orders of chicken nuggets.” The manager turned to her employee, “Can we do that??” Stunned she was asked, the employee said the only logical thing she could, “Well he’s got the cash!” Nick waved the cash at her. The manager stopped. She paused. Then she yelled, “WE NEED NUGGETS NOW!!!!!”
Forty-five minutes later we began eating. Twenty-minutes later we stopped. Over 800 chicken nuggets were consumed. What of the other 200 you ask? Tyler took them to a homeless shelter. After all, everybody loves Wendy’s.
Sunday, December 5, 2010
studying surprises
There are two types of people. There are those that like and understand math, and then there are normal people. Luckily, I fall under the normal people category. Sure, I may have to actually study to understand math, and having lived in Hawaii for a year, I may confuse square root signs for badly drawn waves; but overall, it’s worth it…most of the time.
“Oh you know me, I’ll eat anything…just surprise me.”